Is it just me or has unprotected sex taken the forefront in our sexuality? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have anything against what someone chooses to do in the privacy of their own bedroom. My issue is when you try to instill your beliefs on me. Let me explain myself.
I began dating Marcus and, as usual, things were going great. After a few dates, the conversation of sex came into play. One night after one of our dates, we went back to his house where our kissing led to touching and touching led to us on his couch. Before our rendezvous escalated, he sat up and said, “We need to talk.” My first thought is: Does this dude have a STD or HIV and he didn’t tell me? Marcus continued, “I was wondering if it’s cool with you, that I don’t wear a condom.” I looked at him stunned and slightly confused about the statement. Marcus explained that he was not able to ejaculate when using a condom, so he does not wear them. I explained to him that I do not have unprotected sex unless I’m in a monogamous and serious relationship. Maybe Marcus didn’t hear or understand me because he continued his speech with, “It’s cool, because I’m clean. I don’t have nothing.” Without hesitation, I stood up and said, “I’m sorry; I just cant.”
As I grabbed my keys and walked out his door, I was mind-boggled by the fact of how serious he was about the idea of no condom. I thought being single again would be the biggest challenge that I would have to face, now I have to compete with guys not wearing a condom during casual sex.
While my dating life continued, I found that no condom usage was more common than I thought. It seemed like guys had become more prone to having unprotected sex. The most fascinating thing about this topic were the reasons guys chose not to wear condoms. I’ve heard everything from: the condom is “uncomfortable or too tight” to “condoms don’t do anything for me”. One guy even told me that he liked the freedom and a lot of people were comfortable with it.
Like I stated previously, I have no problem with what one chooses to do. My concern is a lot of people are blind to the fact of the other diseases and infections through sex besides HIV. It does not matter if a person is “clean”; there’s still a chance of receiving: Syphilis, Genital herpes, Gonorrhea, or any other form of STD’s. Maybe I’m overanalyzing this situation. So I leave you with these thoughts: Is unprotected sex a risk we as people are willing to take? Are condoms getting in the way of feeling everything? Is it all about a nut? It makes you think: has the world gone raw?